


Every step of the way.

by Yaspajo



Category: Columbine - Fandom, Dylan Klebold - Fandom
Genre: Dylan Klebold - Freeform, Mental Health Awareness
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-06-16
Updated: 2020-06-16
Packaged: 2021-03-03 19:54:40
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 935
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24751171
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Yaspajo/pseuds/Yaspajo
Summary: A request:A story about Dylan opening up about/and getting help with his mental health and also finding love.
Comments: 3
Kudos: 12





	Every step of the way.

**Author's Note:**

> I wrote this for a guest, I have written this short one shot with Dylan and his love in mind to who he opens up about his mental health struggles and him seeking help for it.
> 
> If you're struggling in any way, always know that reaching out to people for help isn't weakness! It's the best you can give yourself, thinking of Dylan Klebold and Eric Harris I always keep in mind that the best way to "honor" them is to find the help they couldn't. To not let your fear or anger take the better of you. 
> 
> My kik is Reighnmedown and if you need a kickstart for your own path to help ALWAYS feel free to hit me up and I'll try my best to help you on your way <3

Curled up against my boyfriend on his bed we’re just chilling here for the evening. His fingers lazily playing with my hair as we flip through the same channels over again. It’s comfortable and a welcomed break from our busy schedules. “Baby can you meet me Tuesday because I think I need to keep Monday evening free for some last minute studying” I ask Dylan as I turn myself so I’m still settled against him only now I’m facing him. I see struggle in his facial expression and run my hand up to his neck, tracing the lines there a little absentmindedly. 

“I can’t on Tuesday’s, I’m sorry. I can do Wednesday?” he says sounding a little apprehensive. 

“Tuesday's?” I ask emphasizing the plural of the word. He shifts a little underneath me and eventually pushes me up so he can sit up straight. The struggle I saw before is there again. “Are you okay?” I ask him concerned over his body language. He looks at me and licks his lips.

“I want to share something with you, I have for a while now but it’s hard and I’m afraid of your reaction really.” he says looking back and forth between me and his feet. I sit up straight with him and take his hand in mine. “Tell me, talk to me baby” I let him know. He smiles.

“It’s not that easy but I’ll try” he says before he gets up. “So I can’t on Tuesday’s because since the last 5 weeks I’ve been seeing someone, a counselor of sorts” he says looking anywhere but in my direction. 

“A counselor? For what?” I ask him.

“Uhm I struggle with things sometimes and she helps me get perspective.” he says still very closed off, to me and what he’s telling me. But then it’s like a dam opens and all that he wants to tell me spills out. “Since I was like 15 I’ve been having these thoughts. I kept feeling unhappy even when I knew I should be happy. Then it got really bad after a while.” he places his hands in his pockets and his shoulder slum forward a bit. “Sometimes I don’t want to be here at all” now I’m a little confused.

“Be here? Like with me?” I ask confused and misunderstanding.

Dylan’s eyes turn really big as he looks at me.

“No no, I always wanna be with you. I love you.” he says quickly “it has nothing to do with anyone else really. It’s me. I get so sad and overwhelmed with what I want and can’t have or whatever that I uhm” and he hesitates. His eyes close and when he opens them I see desperation in them. “I’ve been wanting to not live for years now and just before we met I felt that maybe I should get some help for it” he looks at me and I can see the fear that’s behind his confession. I get up and walk towards him. Right in front of him I stop I smile at him. He smiles back a little coy. 

“I think that’s really amazing that you’re seeing someone to help you deal with this. It’s scary stuff” I say feeling scared for the guy I love so much. Then I wrap my arms around him. “I love you Dylan and you don’t ever have to feel scared of talking to me” I say with my face buried in his chest. His chin resting on the top of my head as he says “I don’t know what I’d do without you” For a while we stand there just holding onto each other. 

We sit down on the bed together and I throw my legs over his. With his hand he holds them close to him as we start to look at the tv again. Both of us not really paying attention to it because apparently after struggling to start talking, Dylan is now finally able to let it all out.

“It’s like it’s just constantly there you know. I’ll be happy and enjoying something only to just sit down and it all feels worthless, a sort of gloom hangs over me constantly.” Dylan says playing with my hands. 

“How did you deal with it before you sought out help?” I ask him.

He chuckles nervously.

“I didn't, lets just say you do not want to read the journal I kept back then. It was all so dark and felt infinite. The sadness seems infinite.” he says leaning back against the wall behind his bed. 

“Is there anything I can do to help you?” I ask innocently and a little naive maybe. Dylan looks at me and smiles, his hand goes up to my face when he says.

“You can stay with me, see me on other days then Tuesday as much as you can” he says clingy but in a sweet way. I smile back and joke.

“Sorry that’s impossible” making him smile.

“Dammit I asked for too much” he says pulling me closer to him, I feel his heart race underneath me. 

“No baby, I’m here to stay. I’m not going anywhere until you make me.” I say trying to reassure him. He kisses my forehead and whispers a loving “thank you” in my ear. When he feels comfortable enough he changes the subject and we end up almost bouncing on the bed in a good natured pillow fight. Looking at him I can see he still has a long road ahead but he’ll get there, with me next to him. Every step of the way. 


End file.
